Today is a break through day for me. In technical techno babble, I have received and installed my latest round of patches. Today's patch has something to do with the concept of fairness. In my family there is only the two of us, that is my sister and me. From the time I was very young, my mom would drill into us the concept of fairness being very important in our daily affairs. I thought I understood this concept, until recently when I ran into conflict with my mom. I used to think that fairness means same or in terms of material things, something that I have my sister has to have something similar. This concept that I had in my noggin' recently ran into a bit of challenge when I noticed that my mom treated both of us differently. My mom would be very sensitive to all of my sister's needs to the point of feeling scared to leave the house least my sister woke up and found no one around. I felt angry and a bit irritated as I felt that my mom did not practice what she preached. I thought she was a bit of a hypocrite saying something but doing something else.
However, today I allowed the wisdom of the universe to flow through and I realized something. Fairness in my mom's eyes was giving us each exactly what we need for us to be close as a family. In my case I have always been very open and receptive, so I was easier to talk to. My sister speaks a different language emotionally and my mom had to bend certain so called "rules" to accommodate for her. While in the past I felt that this "accommodation" process is double standard treatment, now I see it as the universe way of being "fair". We are all given what we need, and one needs to delve a bit deeper beyond to see "fairness".
A lot of people still have hang ups about this kind of thing especially siblings as they usually feel they are in competition for attention from the day the universe put them in the role of siblings. With this new knowledge, I see all of this "problems" in a new light and I would like to project this knowing to all the other siblings or people that might need it.
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Hi lowks!
Thanks for the interesting post. I have to say, though, I disagree with you about the issue of fairness.
Life, and the universe, are not fair! But here's the thing - they are unfair to our great advantage!
We regularly receive so many blessing in life that we don't actually earn or deserve. Yet the only time we speak of fairness is when we feel we have been wronged.
If a stranger hands us $1,000 as a free gift, we are grateful and happy. If he then gives the next person $10,000, suddenly we're upset that we only got $1,000. We complain "that's not fair". And we're right - because we didn't deserve the $1,000 in the first place.
If we are truly grateful for life, then we should live according to the laws of love, and forget the concept of fairness.
Thanks for sharing.
- Mike
(www.lovetospare.com)
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